Sunday, November 9, 2008

Crash course in parenting

Well this was a "fun" day. I some days feel like I'm on the Truman show (you know the one where Jim Carey's life is actually being set up and filmed and watched by thousands of TV viewers for their entertainment?) Yup. I think I star in the Tennant show lol. So here was today's episode (stay with me because there is an element of Russian adoption in this tale). I am helping out with a friends little guy in taking him to hockey while she is out of town. No biggie. I can tie skates, I know where the equipment goes, and I know not to yell like a rabid hockey mom in the stands (it annoys everyone around you and embarasses the hell out of the kids so it's lose lose... I digress). Everything is going well. Child delivered, dressed and deployed onto the ice. I make a break for a much needed coffee from Timmy's. Arriving back at the rink, I discover that the mom of one of the little boys (Sasha) is from Russia. We have a nice chat about learning English (they have only been here a year) and about where she is from. The nice adotion part of the story is that she is a Russian trained Cardiologist who I'd say is about my age! She was so interested in my adoption story and offered any sort of help I might need - even in reviewing his medicals! Whoo Hoo I'm thinking - this is a fantastic way to spend a Sunday. Then, I hear my name (which is weird because no one knows me here except my friends son who is still on the ice...) except he isn't. He's behind me crying his little eyes out. I launch into OMG he's hurt mode - which thankfully he wasn't, which was quickly followed by OK - what did you do mode... which he did. OK - question - am I supposed to actually WATCH the whole practice? (because lets be real - they are 9... it it's mostly flailing and falling as they swarm like bees around the puck) Now bearing in mind that the version from him followed by the team manager and then the coaching staff were pretty different, I'm sure that the truth resided somewhere in the middle. Suffice to say that I got a crash course in hockey mom today and I think I manged OK. The little guy cried, listened, apologised and I acted as a mediator in the situation. Wow... hockey will be interesting... thankfully I've seen what it's like for coaches on one side of the bench fending off rabid hockey parents and now from a stand in parent side seen what it's like to defend a poor little 9 year old who certainly didn't maliciously spear the other kid in the crotch... this is going to get interesting. Today, I think I might be given a B+ in handling of the situation. Bit my tongue which could have resulted in a failing grade should I have told the coach exactly what I thought of how he spoke to me and to the boy. (instead I told him that the way he spoke to me would terrify any 9 year old and then turned to the other coach and told him how much I appreciated his honesty, candor and kindness in retalling of the event and would be happy to bring the boy in to talk to him... as long as the angry bastard remained silent - OK I didn't say bastard). I mean C'mon... he's 9... he's not mean... they were goofing around and he was poking his friend with his stick (who happens to be one of the coaches kids) and someone got poked in the can... wrong - ok but he doesn't need to be kicked off the team for it!!! Thankfully the other 2 coaches were kind and understanding and realistic... Here's hoping I struck a good balance between ownership of his actions / remorse and the reminder that they are 9... with the suggestion of having him sit out the next game... who knows - I hope it doesn't end his fledgling career in hockey. That said, I can't wait until it's my little guy out there... :-)

1 comment:

Iraida said...

Hi Stacey;

I saw your message on my blog and wanted to check out yours. I'm very sorry about what happened to Scott. I know how it feels to loose the love of your life. But hey, it's great that you decided to adopt. I will visit from time to time to follow your journey.
Hoping you receive your referral soon.